Dealing with the end of life of a loved one is never easy. One of my grandmothers suffered a massive stroke at 98 years old and never woke from a coma. Despite being pretty healthy and independent in most things, she had often said she was ready to go since all her sisters were gone. So when the doctor said there was no hope for recovery, my family chose to stop all life sustaining measures and bring my grandmother home to die. Home hospice came in to check on her and monitor if she was in any pain and to give her a bath every few days. My family consisting of my parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, and nephews either stayed constantly or visited daily. We came from all over the U.S. We talked to her, touched her and kept telling her it was OK to let go but she held on until my cousin Stephanie, who my grandmother raised, was able to get there. It was especially hard for Steph to see our grandmother that way and she was very upset we were not doing anything for her. It really helped to have hospice there to talk to her and be an outside voice of reason.
Having my grandmother at home was a much better experience for my family. A hospital or hospice center wouldn't have allowed the comfort and space for all of us to be together. Having the support of all the family around was wonderful and the little ones were included without having to worry about restrictions or other patients.
Not all families could or would want to do this. We were comfortable taking care of my grandmother and my cousin was experienced with having to give total care and she and I kept her clean in between CNA visits. We also had a hospital bed and a large house that accommodated the 15 or so of us that were there all the time and the 10+ that came to visit daily. We also knew this was going to be for a short period of time. I imagine a hospice center would be much like a home and for those with limited support, it would be a wonderful environment for a loved one's final days.
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